I was not leading recklessly. I said or did what I did based on the information I had at the time. I’m not a toxic person or a bad leader.
In the spirit of reflecting on 2024, I share these thoughts about reflecting on leadership. Any leader worth his or her salt reflects on decisions they made, things they said, and mistakes they made. It is natural to do this but not always helpful. I catch myself thinking about a bad decision or a person I trusted which I should not have. I recall things I said and wish I could travel back in time and take them back. These reflections trouble some of my nights. I catch myself staring.
By staring I mean dwelling on the negative. Beating yourself up over something you said or did. It doesn’t help. To pull myself out of this frozen state of negative reflection, I typically follow this convention: “I was not leading recklessly. I said or did what I did based on the information I had at the time. I’m not a toxic person or a bad leader.”
Looking back is helpful and needed if we are to grow as leaders. I’ve banked many a lesson for use in my future as a leader. Moreover, I’ve banked them for use in helping others avoid the mistakes I’ve made. Instead of beating myself up, I focus instead on the lessons I learned. If you were reckless or did something out of spite, repent. Apologize to those affected (don’t wait too long). Share your failure with others as a way to atone your actions. Redirect that stare when you reflect on your own leadership.
Here are a few conventions for your own leadership reflection:
- Recall the environment you were in when you made the mistake. Hindsight is 20/20 but you probably did not have perfect vision when you did what you did.
- Mistakes are how we grow. There is a goldmine of lessons in our mistakes. Stare at those instead.
- What lessons did you learn? Focus on that instead of the fault…
